I'm planning on getting through it by keeping track of my goals. I have semester long ones, which will break down into monthly ones, which will break down into weekly ones, which will be fit in on a daily to-do list that will have to be squeezed around everyone's activities and doctor's appointments. I'm going to make this work this time. Because in the past I've always been able to put up
I have to prepare honors society stuff for my peers. We have a graduating class this year so it's going to be a little more work than last. Then I have to prime someone to take over when I'm gone. I also have to maintain my grades and continue to learn as much as I possibly can. There's a couple of other personal things in there, too. I'm not going to allow myself time to relax until that daily to-do list is completed. But what counts as "relaxing?"
Things That Don't Count As Relaxing
- Spending Time With My Children. We enter a slippery slope when we find ourselves uttering the words, "But I'm doing all of this for them." It may be 100% true, but the biggest thing I can do for my children is not getting more money so I can buy them more toys that they really don't need. It's not saving for a downpayment on a house. It's not taking crazy lavish family vacations. While those are all things I'd like to do, and, really, I plan on doing in the future if my finances allow, none of them are worth sacrificing time with them. The biggest thing they need is my love, and if I can't find the time to demonstrate that to them on a one-on-one basis, I'm doing something wrong. Don't get me wrong; I'm going to utilize the luxury I have of an extremely generous and geographically close family that offers free baby-sitting. I'm going to have to in order to go out and do all the things I need to. In order to complete papers and homework exercises. But I am not going to allow myself to get so busy that I don't schedule time with them where I can be present and 100% dedicated to the moment they are living in right now.
- Date Nights. The boyfriend and I have sacrificed these in the past. No more. We're not going to go out every week. This would be nice. But it's not realistic. But we will regularly schedule time for our own relationship. Because if our relationship dies, then I've lost the most beautiful thing I have in the world, and no amount of money or career training can replace that. (Yes, my children are the most beautiful thing in the world, but I wouldn't have them without him. And he's kind of the world's most amazing dad ever.)
- Sleep. This will give a bit. I'm not planning on getting anywhere near 8 hours. But I will make a concentrated effort to get enough of it. If I'm not functioning well during the day, then it doesn't matter how late I stayed up to work on those papers or plan that meeting. Because the quality of my work will go down, down, down.
Things That Do Count As Relaxing
- Reading my behemoth of a book. I got this awesome Thomas Jefferson book for Christmas. I'm a super nerd, and reading it has been what I enjoy doing most in my (haha) leisure time lately. It's 1,600 dense pages, and I'm a notoriously slow reader. I like to pretend that the fact increases my retention of information, but I'm not entirely sure that's accurate. While I'd love to finish it sometime this year, it's not a priority. It absolutely falls behind my family, sleep and school work on the list of priorities.
- Watching TV. This is such a timesuck. One of the worst ones. It's nice to turn your brain off and just watch someone else's problems arise and get solved, but it doesn't actually do anything to advance you to your goals.
- Ordering Food. We have a tendency to order food when we get super busy. Because who has time to cook? But the honest truth is that while we're waiting for food, we're usually watching TV or bumming around while we stare at the clock wondering why the feast didn't arrive 20 minutes ago. We're not getting anything done. We could be cooking. We're pretty good at it. And while we were cooking, we could be saving TONS of money that could be used on other, better things.
How do you balance work and family?